Why is it people prefer to encourage you to fail than support your efforts to succeed?


When I first met my husband (over a year ago) I was on a Vegetarian type of diet. I had been putting weight on since I turned 45 and had gone into peri-menopause. By the time I had turned 50 I certainly was at an all time high for my weight and needed to do something about it. I had looked into the health benefits of the vegetarian diet. So when I first met my future in-laws I was already looked at as weird for eating this way.

Since we have been married I have tried to fix “healthy” meals. My husband wasn’t to big on the vegetarian diet (but, he was willing to try it) as he said he was always hungry. My brother-in-law would make fun of the lunches I packed him. Saying things like “what’s she feeding you?” “Eww what is that?” Well it wasn’t working for me either and I actually gained more over the next several months due to still eating processed sugary  foods. So I continued looking for a healthy way to lose weight. My son suggested the 4-Hour Body slow carb diet. We tried it for a couple of weeks and we lost some weight but it just wasn’t quite working for us. More research and I came up with a cross between Paleo and a low-slow carb diet. This one we’ve had our biggest success. We both have commented that we feel so much better, have a ton of energy, and no longer have that sluggish weighed down feeling after eating a meal. Since July we have both lost approx 13-15lbs.  I’ve dropped 4 “pant” sizes, and my husband had to punch a hole in his belt as it hung on him.

Basically we eat only organic & free range meats and eggs, wild caught fish/seafood, fresh fruits and veggies, nuts and seeds. Nothing processed. No refine sugars and grain free. All of our meals are made from scratch. Nothing out of a box or package.

Now, a friend of my husband feels every time he comes over he needs to bring us something. Things like chips, or drink packets, or some kind of processed food. We tell him, “Sorry, can’t eat that, it’s not on our diet. Take it back” (This friend is also an insulin dependant diabetic and shouldn’t be eating the things he brings us)

Once again his brother continues to put down the lunches I fix and offers him some type of processed packaged food from his lunch or some sugary homemade dessert at an effort to thwart my husbands’ weight loss efforts. Why? Why can’t people be encouraging to those who want to make positive changes in their lives which includes eating healthy, exercising, and trying to lose weight? Why do ‘we’ have to feel almost apologetic for wanting to do this?

(My ranting is done for now… 4832)


2 thoughts on “Why is it people prefer to encourage you to fail than support your efforts to succeed?

  1. Hehe, I so much enjoyed your post as it reflects my feelings some time. I tell you why people cannot be supportive, it’s because if they accept that your way of eating is healthier then they will have too look at their diet. Do you think an insulin dependent diabetic would be really scared to realize that his food is killing him? I think he would. By the way, I read recently some studies that diabetes in most cases can be reverted by diet but the doctors won’t promote that because “it’s not realistic to do it”. That means it’s not easy, no instant pill to cure it.
    So, listen to people who understand you and feel compassion for the ones who don’t. Good work for you!
    Visit sometimes my blog for some paleo/SCD recipes if you feel like.


    • Thank you for your supportive comment. Your so right on people having to look at their own diets, but most still believe the misguided belief in the SAD diet as being the way to eat and any other way is extreme. As fir diabetics, A lot of people don’t want to do what is needed in order to even control it properly. My brother included.. I told him a year ago he could reverse his diabetes if he would just make a few healthy changes and he told me “I am not giving up the foods I love to eat, that’s why I take the medication.” How misguided! Thanks again and I check in in your blog regularly. 🙂 To your health

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